Step 1: pick ripe avocados. They should be firm but give a bit under just a bit of pressure. Another test for ripeness: pop that stem cap off the top of the fruit. If it comes off easily and the flesh is green – I prefer a color closer to yellow – you’re good to go. I have four medium-sized avocados here.
Step 2: and quite possibly the most important step: season your avocados with salt before you begin to chop your onions and such. This way, that NaCl has a chance to dissolve by the time your remaining ingredients are ready to be mixed in. You could add salt at the end, but then you have to wait for the salt to fully dissolve. And ain’t nobody got time for that. Double dip on those minutes spent chopping and have your salt already doing its thang.
Step 3: add freshly ground black pepper. You could use the pre-ground stuff, but if you do, this begs the question: why don’t you like your life? As for how much, use how ever much will please your people. We are all pretty hot around my way, so no need to be it and eat it, ya know? Everything in moderation. I just use a generous sprinkling.
Next, finely chop (white or red or yellow) onions and cilantro, about 1/3 of a cup each and set aside in separate bowls. Press three good sized garlic cloves through a garlic press and set those aside. Freshly squeeze about two tablespoons of lemon (not lime – trust me) juice.
Now that your salt has dissolved on your avocados (a-HA!), mash them, but stop mashing just before your desired mashedness level at serving. They’ll continue to break down as you continue to stir, and the goal is for the dip (or side dish, whatever suits your fancy) (my goodness that sounded old) to be the right consistency after you’re done adding your ingredients. We like ours between chunky and smooth. Some people like theirs like puréed baby food, but whatevs. Let them enjoy the wrong way to eat guacamole. 🤷🏽♀️
Step I lost count: mix in your ingredients with a large spoon. I start with about half the onions and cilantro, 3/4 of the pressed garlic, and maybe a tablespoon of the lemon juice. Be sure to break up that hunk of garlic in the middle. 😬
Add a lil’ more of this and a pinch more of that and additional salt and pepper to your desired taste. Then enjoy the finished product…
…with tortilla chips, or along side some slices of smoked brilliance (my phone auto-corrected “brisket” to “brilliance”, which surely applies here) that your daddy made, with a dollop of sour cream. Muy deliciosa.
When you make yours, report back and tell me what you think!