It’s 12:22 PM and My Kids Are Still Asleep and Ain’t Nobody Mad But the Devil and My Husband

My 10-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son assembled a homemade tent to sleep in. The materials included several bed coverings of various sizes, plus my snow-white blanket I had freshly laundered but not yet folded, a curtain rod extension, four flimsy fold-out chairs and one solid one, and a broken-zippered sleeping bag which is now only good as a pallet base. How they pulled this together without their dad or me knowing is a mystery because let me tell ya — its construction was involved.

When they awaken, I have to get their permission to post a pic of the remains of the tent.

Huh? How are they still asleep at 12 noon?

Well, I’m guessing they are still asleep at almost noon due to their consistently going to bed at an ungodly hour, and I suspect that’s happening because I’ve simply outgrown parenting.

But who’s to say, really?

I can tell that their dad/my husband, AKA the fun parent, is about to put his foot down, though. Each day when he comes home and I boast about how late they slept, he just blank stares me, and then resolutely says to them, “You don’t have any business sleeping until noon unless you got off work at 10 o’clock in the morning. And the last time I checked my notes, *checks notes again* yes, I pay allllllll the bills around here,” and I just love him for that.

But while his size 13EEE remains aloft, at 9PM MST, I’ll close out my eating window with this bottle of electrolyte water, a keto-friendly treat of nuts, berries, and Monterey Jack cheese chunks, and giggle at Shawn Harrison in Family Matters and his underrated yet hilarious portrayal of Waldo Geraldo Faldo.

Published by Cheri Washington

I'm a Christ-following, funny wife of one and momma of two. That's all I got.

Join the Conversation

4 Comments

  1. Haha! Mom life is the craziest and best, isn’t it? I’m spending the summer with our daughter, her husband, and our precious three-year-old-almost-four-year-old grandson. He wears me out on a daily basis playing ‘tent’ (man, it gets HOT in those blanket tents), winch (I pretend I’m a truck with a winch and pull him up when he falls (on purpose), and ‘off-roading’ (he drives his electric jeep around the neighborhood and I speed-walk/run to keep up. I have to go to bed shortly after he does and get up super-early to get my introvert time. But it’s all worth it! Treasure those words and bottle your secret to having your kids sleep until noon…I’m sure there’s a market for that! Glad I stopped by today! Your FMF neighbor.

    Like

  2. Oh wow, yes, I have outgrown parenting too! Although he, like your husband, is the fun parent, my husband takes a slightly different approach. Yesterday he asked if we should buy a bunch of paper plates so that I can keep up with the other dishes. Haha. In the past he’s also suggested we have a dish washer installed. Oh well, gotta love him for trying to fix the one area of house work I really struggle with. =)

    Like

Leave a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: